Wit Quotes

A funny person is funny only for so long, but a wit can sit down and go on being spellbinding forever.

Like a sprained ankle boy I aint nothin to play wit

As in smooth oil the razor best is whet, So wit is by politeness sharpest set; Their want of edge from their offence is seen, Both pain us least when exquisitely keen.

Accept a miracle, instead of wit See two dull lines, with Stanhope's pencil writ.

One was a Cartoon Artist with a heart like chiffon and a wit as accidentally malicious as the jab of a pin in a flirt's belt.

This world is a vaporous jest at best, Tossed off by the gods in laughter, And a cruel attempt at wit were it, If nothing better came after.

Where there is a will there's a law suit.

Wit goes for the jugular, not the jocular, and it's the opposite of football; instead of building character, it tears it down.

I think humor is warmer, and wit is colder. Wit is judgment, whereas humor invites some sort of response.

There is naught a man or woman can not learn who hath the wit.

If a man's wit be not apt to distinguish or find differences, let him study the schoolmen; for they are cymini sectores, splitters of hairs.

When a doubt is once received, men labour rather how to keep it a doubt still, than how to solve it; and accordingly bend their wits.

Men ought to find the difference between saltiness and bitterness. Certainly, he that hath a satirical vein, as he maketh others afraid of his wit, so he had need be afraid of others' memory.

Unless man has the wit and the grit to build his civilization on something better than material power, it is surely idle to talk of plans for a stable peace.

Deprived of the company of fools, a great wit does not seem half so clever.

Wit sometimes enables us to act rudely with impunity.

A man does not please long when he has only species of wit.

The desire which urges us to deserve praise strengthens our good qualities, and praise given to wit, valour, and beauty, tends to increase them.

Profundity easily turns into dullness and astuteness deteriorates into wit. Be guided by natural common sense and it will accommodate great and small.

Nobody thanks a witty man for politeness when he puts himself on a par with a society in which it would not be polite to show one's wit.

Wit catches of wit, as fire of fire.

I never have frustrations. The reason is to wit: Of at first I don't succeed, I quit!

I hold a mouses wit not worth a leke, That hath but on hole for to sterten to.

The troublesome ones in a family are usually either the wits or the idiots.

Wit is a form of force that leaves the limbs at rest.

Who can prove Wit to be witty when with deeper ground Dulness intuitive declares wit dull?

The wit of a family is usually best received among strangers.

The Germans wit is in his fingers.

Where the drink goes in, there the wit goes out.

When thou dost tell another's jest, therein Omit the oaths, which true wit cannot need; Pick out of tales the mirth, but not the sin.

In thy discourse, if thou desire to please; All such is courteous, useful, new, or wittie: Usefulness comes by labour, wit byease; Courtesie grows in court; news in the citie.

Wit is not levelled so much at the muscles as at the heart; and the latter will sometimes smile when there is not a single wrinkle on the cheek.

Beauty, like wit, to judges should be shown; Both most are valued where they best are known.

The most hopeful thing in the stories, I hope, is wit. I make it up. If I make up a world in which we're ruled by big talking turds, it doesn't mean that we are. So you shouldn't feel depressed.

The Sarajevans have a very particular world view - a mordant wit coupled with this unbearable sadness and... truckloads of guts, you know.

Sadness is the matrix from which wit and irony spring; sadness is uncomfortable and creative, which is why consumer society cannot tolerate it.

The mighty and supreme Jesus, who was to transfigure all humanity by his divine wit and grace-this Jesus has flown.

The wholly manly man lacks the wit necessary to give objective form to his soaring and secret dreams, and the wholly womanly woman is apt to be too cynical a creature to dream at all.

Every failure teaches a man something, to wit, that he will probably fail again.

If you can't convince them [with your logic] then just confound them [with your wit.]

He thought he was a wit, and he was half right.

Nothing is so fatiguing as the life of a wit.

Fashion is always silly, for, before it can spread far, it must be calculated for silly people; as examples of sense, wit, or ingenuity could be imitated only by a few.

The whole [Scotch] nation hitherto has been void of wit and humour, and even incapable of relishing it.

Take a portion of wit, And fashion it fit, Like a needle, with point and with eye: A point that can wound, An eye to look round, And at folly or vice let it fly

The picture placed the busts between Adds to the thought much strength; Wisdom and Wit are little seen, But Folly's at full length.

In his life, [Dalton] Trumbo uses wit and comedy to fight these very high-stakes battles.

One should never risk a joke, even of the mildest and most unexceptional charters, except among people of culture and wit.

It is a great misfortune not to possess sufficient wit to speak well, nor sufficient judgment to keep silent.

The writings of women are always cold and pretty like themselves. There is as much wit as you may desire, but never any soul.