Funny Quotes
I really think I'd be better at, like, advanced napping techniques.
Making love to a person in their sleep is the only guarantee they'll wake up with a smile on their face.
It is funny that those who make the laws by which we are expected to live are usually the ones who have no regard for it.
Oh don’t be such a fuss pot, ” said the fairy, “or I’ll call you Fussy Pants, instead of Silly Pants!
An educated theologian: someone who's better at rationalizing what they're pretending to know.
Somehow, I think God will forgive her. If not, eh, Hell has better parties anyway.
Jehovah’s Witness? Don’t sweat it. I’m going to hell, already booked my ticket. Bright side? I’m pagan. Your hell is my heaven... if for no other reason than you won’t be there.
We must have taken a wrong turn turning somewhere.""Where, Purgatory?" said Dozy. "We're in Hell.
What is Hell like?" I blurted out before I could stop myself. Damn my curiosity. "You've never been there?" He eyed me suspiciously. Yeah, I went to Hell every summer for vacation.
Aline!" Isabelle looked appalled. "You can't just go around asking people what it's like to be a vampire.
And honestly, given the choice of facing my mother or a vampire, I think I'd always choose the latter.
The only person I compete with is Satan. If that happens to be you, then could you please move out of the way? You’re standing in Christ’s spot.
It's not funny anymore...", did you heard your self, you are entering a position called, "I wanna be a victim..., please take me".
I call the right axe Sorrow, " she said. "You know what I call the left one?" "Happiness?" "Sorrow. I can't tell them apart.
don't just listen to people crying, hear the reasons why they cry
It wasn't like there was a dating and mating website for bear shifters. If there had been, its mascot would have been that yellow Care Bear with the heart on its stomach.
Hormones, it seemed, we're making a much-delayed appearance in her life.Liv was horrified.
I attacked him, he healed me, then he took me hunting, I threatened him, and he took me home. Wow. That was like a date.
Maybe I shouldn't scare off my date so quickly by shooting guns and telling stories about vomit, but, hey, the sooner he knows the real me, the better.
When a boy's first romantic interlude is with Pheobe the Dog-Faced Girl, he feels a need to get out into the world and find a new life.
ONLY' having the Gift, people appreciate this madness as Art. Everybody wants to have Art in their lives, but no body wants to have what the Art came out from in their lives...
Time heals all wounds. Unless they're infected. Like gangrene. That shit'll kill you.
The people who are scared of ghosts are the ones who discuss most about them.
Only criminals and madmen walk into Central Park after midnight...or, occasionally, an actor. (Dark City Lights)
The dimple in his left cheek was ironic-it gave the impression that he was sweet as a cupcake. (Dark City Lights)
We skipped right over Walmart on the ladder down.
At least a hospital stay will give him an excuse to halt the job hunt.
Cigarette smoke when i didn't ask for it. Never when I did.
You can't draw lines in the sand like that. Humour's a tsunami that doesn't care about your little lines.
In summers, after 1 hour of extreme gaming you can use your laptop to iron your shirt.
We got there without being spotted. I pulled her in, then shut the door, pressing my back to it and exhaling like an epileptic pilot who'd just landed a cargo plane full of dynamite.
Why would a comediotic guy like Buzz Aldrin worry about who said what first? He was on the %$#@!+-oon!
If you don't fall down now and again, it just means the training wheels are working
Well, bloody noses." I hug his coat tighter. "Those are definitely hot.