Phyllis Diller Quotes

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing.

We spend the first 12 months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next 12 months teaching them to sit down and shut up.

I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.

It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder, and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge.

I'm at an age where my back goes out more than I do.

Cleaning your house while your children are still growing is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing.

In most states you can get a driver's license when you're sixteen years old which made a lot of sense to me when I was sixteen years old but now seems insane.

The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing.