Dan Harmon Quotes

Find your voice, shout it from the rooftops, and keep doing it until the people that are looking for you find you.

Storytelling comes naturally to humans, but since we live in an unnatural world, we sometimes need a little help doing what we'd naturally do.

Once upon a time, something happened, and it was better than something not happening. The end.

All [tv] shows are like cigarettes. You watch two, you have a higher chance of watching three. They're all addictive.

Don't be so hard on yourself, don't put pressure on yourself, life is just a chain of experiments and results, and you'll be perfect when you're dead.

I am a collaborator with everyone who agrees that I need to be in control. I happily collaborate with my loyalists.

I always try to use my medium, and if I get into a normal sitcom-writing contest with normal sitcom writers, I'm going to lose.

Pretty sad. Pretty lonely. But that's how I prefer it? I quess? I guess. It's a good guess. It's the best quess ever.

I feel like my life has always been the 'Hey Look at Me Show.' I'm not apologetic about that.

The public's perception of your show is what it is, and you don't get to complain how people perceive your show or talk about it.

I don't really have a lot of appropriate feelings for people on an individual basis, but I've always wanted to make people happy.

There's a fine line between a stream of consciousness and a babbling brook to nowhere.

My cat brought me a toy. I thanked her and threw it. She sat there gave me a look that made me realize people and dogs are the crazy ones.

I think thoughts in my head bounce around in my skull and, if they keep bouncing around in my skull, they get worse and worse. When they come out of my mouth, they make people happy.

You have to just look at it like Titanic: I know the ship sinks, but this is a love story

Everyone knows that there are more people watching any given show than is being registered by the Nielsen system.

Yoda is interesting because, in addition to being wise, he is two feet tall, and a Yoda.

The concept of doing holiday episodes is a huge part of what's fantastic about doing TV. And viewers agree; you see the numbers going up for holiday episodes.

Garry Shandling has always been a pioneer of… meta entertainment. He's always been a defender of the creative right to use the frame as part of the painting.

I expect the audience to assume TV is stupid. I accept that it's my job to overcome it.

Class clowns are never allowed to date anybody decent, but you don't get beaten up, you're invited to parties, and everybody likes you.

I'm from Wisconsin so I always feel a little nauseous about begging and trying to trick people into liking me.

I wish people used wishes to modify themselves instead of others. Wish to be low maintenance. Wish to be autonomous, even.

I don't think it's going to be possible for the next generation of writers to tell stories without telling stories about telling stories.

I walk with God, and He protects me. That may very well be true. I don't mean to make that sound like a joke, in case He is in charge.

I've discovered a new video game called owning my home.

I wish that television would stop selling our hatred of ourselves, and start seducing us with our love of ourselves.

I was raised on NBC television.

Television is a populous, derivative, democratic medium.

I feel like I am a good person and a professional, very able leader of men.

If your ratings are high and there’s money being made, you’re allowed to be a perfectionist in television.

I love 30 Rock. It's one of my favorite shows. It's certainly the gold standard of comedy writing.

If somebody's cat happens to turn on the TV, my numbers can double. It's almost unrelated to what's really happening.

It was never my direct intention to do anything particularly medium-defying.

When you are in the 8 o'clock position, you can either be a cultural phenomenon, or you're endangered. It's a tough time slot.

Always hedge your bets. That's how I do it. I lay all my bets on what I can contribute, and suffer no illusions that I'm generating stuff by myself.

'I want to touch people but if I touch them in real life they'll slap me.' That's what writing isit's a gross person getting a hug.

I really like performing for people.

You don’t give someone notes on their performance at a soup kitchen.

I say what's in my head, and I'm on honest ground. That is worth so much, and I think it does make my job, as a writer, easier. It makes it possible for me to give people stuff that they like.

Wake up in the morning and say, 'I refuse to be a hack,' and see what happens by the end of the day.

Good writers hate bad writing but hating bad writing doesn’t make you good. Writing badly does.

What's important is passion, investment, and people laughing out loud as they work.

I am absolutely and inherently self-destructive in that I am always making sure I'm doing what I want to do.

I was playing the game where I was going to be a great TV or film writer some day and there was nothing else that I thought about, including other people.

Technology changes the medium. I grew up on watching a box in my living room that made my parents happy. After something is gone, the dust will settle and I'll see what's next.

With media, it's never bad-to-good. It's always just moving from different to different. Faster, more stuff, but there's always good, more good, and more bad.

There are no normal people, there are just different kinds of weird.

There's the same percentage of genius happening in both genders, but there's less women writing scripts and out there looking for the job.

I've never done well when I've been appreciated. I've done best when I'm targeted for death.