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Amy Sedaris Quotes

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Amy Sedaris Quotes: "Don't leave a piece of jewelry at his house so you can go back and get it later; he may be with his real girlfriend."

Don't leave a piece of jewelry at his house so you can go back and get it later; he may be with his real girlfriend.




Amy Sedaris Quotes: "Sometimes losing a pet is more painful than losing a human because in the case of the pet, you were not pretending to love it."

Sometimes losing a pet is more painful than losing a human because in the case of the pet, you were not pretending to love it.




Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I think it's good for a person to spend time alone. It gives them an opportunity to discover who they are and to figure out why they are always alone."

I think it's good for a person to spend time alone. It gives them an opportunity to discover who they are and to figure out why they are always alone.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I choose to do unattractive people, because then I can pretend they think they're attractive."

I choose to do unattractive people, because then I can pretend they think they're attractive.




Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I have always wanted a bunny and I'll always have a rabbit the rest of my life."

I have always wanted a bunny and I'll always have a rabbit the rest of my life.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "although it has been said that idle hands are the devil's workshop, when it comes to teenagers, both idle and active hands are the devil's workshop."

although it has been said that idle hands are the devil's workshop, when it comes to teenagers, both idle and active hands are the devil's workshop.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I like crafts that come out of poverty or necessity. There used to be hobby shops where you'd get your supplies, and then you'd use your imagination."

I like crafts that come out of poverty or necessity. There used to be hobby shops where you'd get your supplies, and then you'd use your imagination.




Amy Sedaris Quotes: "Don't answer the door in a wedding dress and veil, he might not think you're joking."

Don't answer the door in a wedding dress and veil, he might not think you're joking.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "You know when you watch old movies, it's always the small parts you remember, the character actors who come in like a breath of fresh air."

You know when you watch old movies, it's always the small parts you remember, the character actors who come in like a breath of fresh air.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "My favorite things often have a story behind them and are usually handmade or discovered at a flea market."

My favorite things often have a story behind them and are usually handmade or discovered at a flea market.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "Before you can give of yourself to others you must know what of yourself you have to give. Every person is special. In all the land there is only one you, possibly two, but seldom more than sixteen."

Before you can give of yourself to others you must know what of yourself you have to give. Every person is special. In all the land there is only one you, possibly two, but seldom more than sixteen.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "It's natural for humans to suppress urges, for when our desires are left unchecked they lead to broken relationships, prison time, and forest fires."

It's natural for humans to suppress urges, for when our desires are left unchecked they lead to broken relationships, prison time, and forest fires.




Amy Sedaris Quotes: "Crafting is putting ideas into action and then holding them together with an inexpensive adhesive."

Crafting is putting ideas into action and then holding them together with an inexpensive adhesive.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I was just a kid. I think I stole a candy bar. I remember feeling so terrible. It was the worst shock. I was probably 7. That's my least favorite feeling: guilt."

I was just a kid. I think I stole a candy bar. I remember feeling so terrible. It was the worst shock. I was probably 7. That's my least favorite feeling: guilt.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I'm gonna do the whole bedroom in camel color - it's an old lady color."

I'm gonna do the whole bedroom in camel color - it's an old lady color.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "My mom used to say that Greek Easter was later because then you get stuff cheaper."

My mom used to say that Greek Easter was later because then you get stuff cheaper.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I like to make things, but I looked at old craft books on weaving or mosaics or whatever, I'm like, 'I don't really know anything about that stuff.'"

I like to make things, but I looked at old craft books on weaving or mosaics or whatever, I'm like, 'I don't really know anything about that stuff.'



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I swear I want to be a food model."

I swear I want to be a food model.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I cried when I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. And then I laughed REALLY hard."

I cried when I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. And then I laughed REALLY hard.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "Learn more about yourself! Make a self-esteem collage using pictures of other people you wish you were."

Learn more about yourself! Make a self-esteem collage using pictures of other people you wish you were.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "More men than women like 'Strangers With Candy'. Pretty girls don't like the show. They don't like to see an ugly lady."

More men than women like 'Strangers With Candy'. Pretty girls don't like the show. They don't like to see an ugly lady.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I failed first grade, which is my biggest problem. You always feel like a failure, like you're stupid."

I failed first grade, which is my biggest problem. You always feel like a failure, like you're stupid.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "It was more of their quirky show. It was more like a cult show. The ratings weren't really that high."

It was more of their quirky show. It was more like a cult show. The ratings weren't really that high.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "Usually, the best ideas come from other people's good ideas, which then, after a short gestation period, become your ideas."

Usually, the best ideas come from other people's good ideas, which then, after a short gestation period, become your ideas.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "Begin your story with a sentence that will immediately grab hold of your listener's ears like a surly nun in a Catholic school."

Begin your story with a sentence that will immediately grab hold of your listener's ears like a surly nun in a Catholic school.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I've never played anyone who didn't like themselves. I don't care if they're unattractive, but it's important that they think of themselves as attractive. And I guess that's part of their charm."

I've never played anyone who didn't like themselves. I don't care if they're unattractive, but it's important that they think of themselves as attractive. And I guess that's part of their charm.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I have no desire to carry a movie."

I have no desire to carry a movie.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "But I love how people who are musical, they know how to dress."

But I love how people who are musical, they know how to dress.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I always got along with all types of people - popular people as well as drug addicts."

I always got along with all types of people - popular people as well as drug addicts.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "People who shop in health food stores never look healthy."

People who shop in health food stores never look healthy.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I am an aging Girl Scout."

I am an aging Girl Scout.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I always find something to keep me busy."

I always find something to keep me busy.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "My mother always said 'Don't bother other people.' I think that's good advice."

My mother always said 'Don't bother other people.' I think that's good advice.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I wasn't a cliquey person, and I think that's because I came from a large family. I got along with everybody, and I usually got along with the people that people didn't like."

I wasn't a cliquey person, and I think that's because I came from a large family. I got along with everybody, and I usually got along with the people that people didn't like.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "My little brother Paul. He owns his own floor sanding business called Silly P Hardwood Floors and hes really good."

My little brother Paul. He owns his own floor sanding business called Silly P Hardwood Floors and hes really good.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "Accentuaute the positives - medicate the negatives."

Accentuaute the positives - medicate the negatives.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "My father and I have a very good relationship. We always got along. But I always scold him."

My father and I have a very good relationship. We always got along. But I always scold him.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "Books are challenging and inspirational to me."

Books are challenging and inspirational to me.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "You think in a different way when you don't have any money. The joy of poverty is that you use your imagination to come up with stuff."

You think in a different way when you don't have any money. The joy of poverty is that you use your imagination to come up with stuff.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "There's humor in everything. There's gotta be humor in everything."

There's humor in everything. There's gotta be humor in everything.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "If you see a shy person, ask them some questions like, 'Why are you so shy? Tell everyone, we're all listening."

If you see a shy person, ask them some questions like, 'Why are you so shy? Tell everyone, we're all listening.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I’ve named everything that I’ve ever owned. Real or inanimate, I have to give it a first and last name. Everything in my apartment comes alive at night."

I’ve named everything that I’ve ever owned. Real or inanimate, I have to give it a first and last name. Everything in my apartment comes alive at night.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I wouldn't call myself a shut-in. I have the ability to leave my home; I just choose not to. But because I'm such a homebody, it's important to be surrounded by things I love."

I wouldn't call myself a shut-in. I have the ability to leave my home; I just choose not to. But because I'm such a homebody, it's important to be surrounded by things I love.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "On the off chance that you have children, don't clean up at all. As children, my brother and sister and I loved waking up early and playing cocktail party with the leftover debris"

On the off chance that you have children, don't clean up at all. As children, my brother and sister and I loved waking up early and playing cocktail party with the leftover debris



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "A lot of times girls think they're funny, but they want to pretty at the same time, and if you want to be funny, you have to be willing to get ugly."

A lot of times girls think they're funny, but they want to pretty at the same time, and if you want to be funny, you have to be willing to get ugly.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "That's how all theater should be done - you only have one chance to see it and then it's gone. One night only."

That's how all theater should be done - you only have one chance to see it and then it's gone. One night only.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I hate playing pretty or sane people. Most people are not attractive or all there."

I hate playing pretty or sane people. Most people are not attractive or all there.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I like to be the one in charge of everything."

I like to be the one in charge of everything.



Amy Sedaris Quotes: "I love depressing movies and depressing books."

I love depressing movies and depressing books.