Yes sir, I am a tortured man for all seasons, as they say, and I have powerful friends in high places. Birds sing where I walk, and children smile when they see me coming.

The downward spiral of Dumbness in America is about to hit a new low.

Life has become immeasurably better since I have been forced to stop taking it seriously.

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

I learned a long time ago that reality was much weirder than anyone's imagination.

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that claim a God and the only thing that behaves like it hasn't got one.

Sleep late, have fun, get wild, drink whisky and drive fast on empty streets with nothing in mind but falling in love and not getting arrested.

America... just a nation of two hundred million used car salesmen with all the money we need to buy guns and no qualms about killing anybody else in the world who tries to make us uncomfortable.

So we shall let the reader answer this question for himself: who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived or he who has stayed securely on shore and merely existed?

Anything that gets your blood racing is probably worth doing.

Hope rises and dreams flicker and die. Love plans for tomorrow and loneliness thinks of yesterday. Life is beautiful and living is pain.

This journey has nourished my soul in a way I couldn't have imagined.

I could shoot you in the foot.""Please do. At least then I wouldn't have to endure this sock humiliation any longer.

Becoming limitless involves mental agility

There is no safer anchorage for our learning, our lives, and our public actions than that provided by Divine teachings.

Oh, all those ridiculous people with zero talent who spend their lives making sure everyone knows their name. Those stupid, stupid people.

I don't like cruises. Period. My biggest nightmare is being stuck on a boat.

Government should steer, not row.

Having a little inflation is like being a little pregnant.

Aggression is the most common behavior used by many organizations, a nearly invisible medium that influences all decisions and actions.

What is the use of living, if it be not to strive for noble causes.