The monk that invented gunpowder did as much to stop war as did all the sermons of his brethren.

Those who think it is permissible to tell white lies soon grow color-blind.

Patience is the analogue of God's serenity.

Some folks never handle the truth without scratching it.

If you sit by the wayside waiting for Success, your knees will be too stiff to follow her when she passes.

Love is a boomerang that returns to the thrower's hand.

The bigger the dam of patience, the worse the flood when the dam breaks.

We use religion like a trolley-car--we ride on it only while it is going our way.

Reason clears and plants the wilderness of the imagination to harvest the wheat of art.

Show me a genuine case of platonic friendship, and I shall show you two old or homely faces.

A home-made friend wears longer than one you buy in the market.

Creating light is a wiz

The key to happiness is......to hide the damn key in a place that only you can access.

Your money habits and investment strategy is not all about what you do, but much about who you are. Become the person it takes to do, succeed, and innovate.

Sometimes good is preventing us for being better".rbasequia..

My father, when he went, made my childhood a gift of a half a century.

It was that depressing time in the early morning where the only people about were milkmen, police officers- and time travellers.

Good intentions are wicked! As far as I can see, all they lead to are lies and delusions.

It comes down to something really simple: Can I visualize myself playing those scenes? If that happens, then I know that I will probably end up doing it.

In order for a society to survive, it must generate a sufficient level of physical production both to meet its current needs, and to produce a surplus for upgrading its productive powers.

Now, I think the people who are still doing stand-up are doing it because they love stand-up.