I am a professional sportswriter, among other things, and I take the games seriously. It is only one of my many powerful addictions, and I don't mind admitting any of them.

The downward spiral of Dumbness in America is about to hit a new low.

Life has become immeasurably better since I have been forced to stop taking it seriously.

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

I learned a long time ago that reality was much weirder than anyone's imagination.

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that claim a God and the only thing that behaves like it hasn't got one.

Sleep late, have fun, get wild, drink whisky and drive fast on empty streets with nothing in mind but falling in love and not getting arrested.

America... just a nation of two hundred million used car salesmen with all the money we need to buy guns and no qualms about killing anybody else in the world who tries to make us uncomfortable.

So we shall let the reader answer this question for himself: who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived or he who has stayed securely on shore and merely existed?

Anything that gets your blood racing is probably worth doing.

Hope rises and dreams flicker and die. Love plans for tomorrow and loneliness thinks of yesterday. Life is beautiful and living is pain.

Everything in life had a purpose, and unless it achieved that purpose, it was just taking up space on the planet and wasting everybody's time.

In spite of all - Be Happy.

I have found the more fantastic the setting, the more truthful the confessions.

I said kiss me again.” A sultry smile curved her lips. “Would that be such a difficult task to perform?”Christ almighty, she wanted him to kiss her again. And she was ordering him to do so.

Complexity and intelligence grow from simplicity, not from greater complexity.

There's huge, massive mother ships going up to the Yukon. They've been filmed and are on video.

There is a time when the hoary head of inveterate abuse will neither draw reverence nor obtain protection.

Soft, sweet things with a lot of fancy dressing - that's what a little boy loves to eat and a grown man prefers to marry.

Stars today are just masturbation images.

There's always that feeling of 'Oh, God! One day they'll find out that I really have no idea what I'm doing.