Flies die in so many lonely places. -Roberta Rohbeson

If it is your time, love will track you down like a cruise missile.

The strips are nearly effortless unless I am really emotionally upset, a wreck.

Love is an exploding cigar we willingly smoke.

We don't create a fantasy world to escape reality. We create it to be able to stay.

I started doing cartoons when I was about 21. I never thought I would be a cartoonist. It happened behind my back. I was always a painter and drawer.

If I didn't try to eavesdrop on every bus ride I take or look for the humor when I go for a walk, I would just be depressed all the time.

No matter what, expect the unexpected. And whenever possible BE the unexpected.

I was unable to sleep and I would stay up and draw these little cartoons. Then a friend showed them around. Before I knew it I was a cartoonist.

Sometimes, I think the only art left for us is slowly peeling the label off a beer bottle while somebody tells you about a dream they had.

What year is it in your imagination?

Forgive and be happy.

Truth... has no obligation to console you.

The natural condition of the modern conservative movement is to always be in a state of revolution. Conservatives are, by definition, uncomfortable with power.

I was heavily influenced by Andy Kaufman and Steven Wright.

It is very difficult to be learned; it seems as if people were worn out on the way to great thoughts, and can never enjoy them because they are too tired.

God's designs regarding you, and His methods of bringing about these designs, are infinitely wise.

I'm more interested than Philip Roth in understanding women, even if I do it imperfectly. But that book, Portnoy's Complaint, is literary punk in this way that is rare.

Government cannot make man richer, but it can make him poorer.

Friendship is made fast by interwoven benefits.

Personal desire, age, and my health do not allow me to personally have a role in running the country [i.e. Iran] after the fall of the current system [of the Shah].