Humour Quotes
If you want the extra-ordinary, you've got to be willing to forsake the ordinary' - Annie Grimes in Mr Alhourani's Dead Man's Spots
Our friend Chewy doesn’t speak much, but he chews a lot of tobacco so we call him Chewbacco.
Foolish potato, talking to her like that won’t work. You’ve got to be mean and show off your foil-wrapped rigidity.
Nonsense, this is my home and I must defend it. It’s time for Santa to get serious.
Women in love are patheticand I cannot be bothered, for now, I am back to metaphysicsand my armpits gather hair.
If Beyoncé Knowles and Miley Cyrus represent the latest branch of feminism, then surely the male-dominated power elite must be aroused with concern.
The public thinks big, sensible, measured thoughts while people run around doing silly things
If you say it very softly, with a smile, you can get away with saying almost anything, even the truth.
Shit happens. You can either stand their and complain about the smell or you can wipe your shoe and keep walking.
Sometimes the walk to the doctors is a better cure than the medicine you receive
Someone will complete you some day and that day will never be late. Those nouns and verbs are above wonderful and never ending .
I BELIEVE EVERYONE IS SPECIAL . . . BUT SOME PEOPLE THINK . . . . IT'S JUST ANOTHER WAY OF SAYING NO-ONE IS
In politics no permanent friends, no permanent enemies but permanent interest.
First I was decayed, I was putrefied. Kept thinking I could never live on, now that I had died...
Of course I began to see Nikki, which was strange because I was staring into Danny's eyes, and Danny is a six-foot-three black man who looks nothing like my ex-wife.
To neglect ones own ability to laugh is the greatest form of Blasphemy, for to laugh is to pray.
I love religious nuts. They make me remember I have them too. So, being a health nut, I scratch them religiously. Just as I do my butt.
On a supra human level, yeah, I got That Which Is. Yet on a simple human level, rare are times when either my left or my right foot is not in some kind of shit.
Humans, left to own misguided devices, scratches the Divine in the self as one would the lice, but remember to lick well all the vices.
Marcus looked down. “Ah, man! This was my favorite shirt. Who tore it?” he asked, trying to pull the ragged edges together.
If you cannot laugh frequently and genuinely, you have no soul.
If you have seen darkness, you will appreciate the dawn of light.
Never trust a person whose smile doesn't reach their eyes, chances are they do similar thing when they "cry" - Just be sure you have that OSCAR ready next time they do this
In some rare cases, a friendship between two people benefits both of them, and what’s more, in some rarer cases, it benefits both of them equally.
You should visit the Palatine. It's at the top of that hill . . .""I know where the Palatine is, Dexter, I was visiting Rome before you were born.""Yes, who was emperor back then?
If you feel that you can solve others problems, then please, work little more on your own problems and solve them first.
Aglaya just rolled her eyes. "You're like a ten year-old.""Ten-and-a-half, " Kev defended. "But I read at a fourteen year-old level.
Think before you speak, unless it's urgent
So, am I too, like all other humans, just a rogue? Sure! Just a notch less than those rascals wearing godly robes.
If a religious book makes you harbor ill thoughts about those with differing faith, then, you're reading the wrong crap of late.
Mark Spitz didn't ask about Harry. You never asked about the characters that disappeared from a Last Night story. You knew the answer. The plague had a knack for narrative closure.
She's become a Russian again, he thought. When something works, she's grateful. When it doesn't work, it's life.
Some of our friends are our friends only because we used to be friends.
One of these days, I would doubt the Gardeners a little too much and Zach was going to play handball with my head.
I’ve been living on the edge for so long, my friends call me Cliff
The other day, a friend of a friend said that everyone started out as girls, but boys evolved… But don’t worry girls, I hit him.
I won’t have you calling me Miss Tuttle. That’s what the doc calls me. And the lady at the bank. One takes my temperature and the other my money. Friends don’t take anything—they give.