The best things in life are free - and $19.95.

Life's a pitch, and then you buy.

You know what, rip me off once, shame on me. But twice? I'm coming after you and taking back what's mine.

I enjoy what I do. I think it shows.

I'm a pitchman, my business comes from the pitch, nothing else.

It's a funny business. I kind of compare it to baseball. I'm always looking for a home run.

It's important for me to sell a product that works.

You will succeed in everything you want to do, so start today with your heart and with your love.

I do have nightmares. So what? I wouldn’t trade places with any of the f**kers I killed. Am I afraid of Hell? No. I’ve been. It’s worse than advertised but not as bad as imagined. ~ Brandon Hull

Some people have written that my writing has helped them go on. It has helped me too. The writing, the roses, the 9 cats.

Families in real life don't tend to resolve things neatly.

If a well-constituted individual refrains from blazoning aught amiss or calamitous in his family, a nation in the like circumstance may without reproach be equally discreet.

There may be trouble ahead - But while there's moonlight, and music, and love, and romance -Let's face the music and dance.

Oh well, no matter what happens, there's always death.

People who don't cherish their elderly have forgotten whence they came and whither they go.

War is the supreme form of prestige.

I believe that there is a longing in my soul that searches the whole world.