I once knew a man who stole a Ferris Wheel.

I don t mind a reasonable amount of trouble.

I've been as bad an influence on American literature as anyone I can think of.

The problem with putting two and two together is that sometimes you get four, and sometimes you get twenty-two.

Joel Cairo: You always have a very smooth explanation ready. Sam Spade: What do you want me to do, learn to stutter?

Listen, darling, tomorrow I'll buy you a whole lot of detective stories, but don't worry your pretty little head over mysteries tonight.

I couldn't be fonder of you if you were my own son. But, well, if you lose a son, its possible to get another. There's only one Maltese Falcon.

My way of learning is to heave a wild and unpredictable monkey-wrench into the machinery.

Feed the lettuce to the bunny and eat the bunny.

The cheaper the crook, the gaudier the patter.

You got to look on the bright side, even if there ain't one.

What matters is what we make of our existence.

Memo to extreme partisans: If you can't bring yourselves to love your enemies, can you at least learn to hate your friends?

Have you ever had a beautiful melody stuck in your head, but you don't know where it came from? That melody is me.

Nature, like man, sometimes weeps from gladness.

You know, an hour and fifty-four minutes is too much for audiences. They get nervous.

You might as well say that the woman lies on top of the man when they are making the babies.

I send my thoughts afar, and let them paint your Christmas Day at home.

Congratulations on your well deserved retirement, Wishing you every happiness in the years ahead. No lying about your age, more lying around the house After lying much longer in bed

In the end, I play a lot of friends and I really think it's about time that some ethnic girls get out there in the lead part. So we're developing something.

I hate it when, after I let a white person know they've said something racist, I end up having to listen for hours to their life.