I don't read memoirs. But if you write a memoir, I would think you'd want people to know, "O.K., look, I've taken some liberties here." It's just a matter of being open with your readers.

You would be amazed by what you can give up, lose, or break, and yet still be a person who gets happy over brownies.

...handsome people are always interesting to watch. But a handsome person in crisis is riveting.

You need to grab your dream out of the sky like it's a kite and pinch the string through your fingers until you reach the spool.

I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.

I can't tell you how much I love Target and Costco, that kind of culture, because it's something I never felt a part of. I've always felt like a tourist because I have never fit in anywhere.

Should I just sit down, right here at carousel seven, and shake until somebody's arms are around me and they're saying, 'It's okay, I'm here, I'm here, come with me to the institute.

You are allowed to be alive. You are allowed to be somebody different. You are allowed to not say goodbye to anybody or explain a single thing to anyone, ever.

His laugh is made if porch swings and lemonade

But I can also write in crappy motel rooms, while standing in line, or sitting in the dentist's chair.

I wouldn't want to waste any of my brain cells on forgiving if it's holding me back.

If you ever want to see how small you are in the plan of God, just stand at the edge of an ocean.

I believe there's something in the Bible about 'Thou shalt not call anyone insane who owns and is competent with more firearms than you own sharp sticks.'

As a salesperson, you will be judged by your ability to keep a stalled conversation moving along briskly.

Dreams were all they gave for free to ugly duckling girls like me.

My favorite type of music to sing is a crossover between country and pop.

The reason some younger women were willing to go out with my flabby, ageing self was that no one of their own age would put up with them for more than 10 minutes.

We must not stand upon trifles.

All you earnest young men out to save the world. . . please, have a laugh.

Do I think I'm a national treasure? I don't see why not? I don't see why I shouldn't be. I'm a good lad, really.

Of all base passions, fear is the most accursed.