Has anyone sen Mr Snark " "I saw him in the tunnel about 15 minutes ago." "Oh no " wailed Dr Ferman "he will have been atomised." "Oh dear" muttered an MP. "Bye-election.

A moral dilemma is equally absorbing whether the stakes are the destiny of nations or the happiness of one or two people - at the most.

A slight concussion of the brain simplifies matters so beautifully.("Three O'Clock")

I had never imagined myself doing [wrestling]. Once I came to the realization that it was a possibility, I just tried to concentrate on what I thought people would enjoy.

All I knew about shot putting was that my [older] brother could do 44 feet. I decided I wanted to beat him. . . . So I got a shot and went to work and made up my mind to do 45 feet.

The most important six inches on the battlefield is between your ears.

I am the Fred Astaire of karate.

If you don't show up at a party, people will assume you're fat.

If you don't have passion, change.

Cinema has reached a dead end.

The Song of Love, the Song of Hate, the Songs of Praise and of Thanksgiving; I've learned them all, but there remains one called the Melody of Living.

I wish that Prince Charles had been shot. I think it would have made the world a more interesting place.