Do it for the kids! The ones who look up to you — especially when they are pleading for their lives." — Bats 2015

...causing her eyes to bulge and her tongue to flick from behind her luscious lips, scaring away insects." — Amok 2015

Elizabeth served herself to Vlad upon the Lazy Susan (Susan wasn’t lazy. She was actually dead." — Bats 2015

He sniffed until the long hairs of his mustache had been sucked up into his nose and out of his leafy ears." — Bats 2015

Purrrrrrrr” Elizabeth kneaded Vlad's pecs. “I hear a Kitty!” Vlad’s eyes sprung open. There was a moment of hurt, of sad. There was no kitty. “You’re teasing me!" — Bats

Elizabeth poured the brewskilicious foam over her aforementioned bodalicious huzza-huzzas and Wahwahzoozie." — Bats 2015

Gentle With Them Thar Spurs'—a sequel to 'Riders of the Purple Sau-Sage.' Spurs was the feminist novel of its day…which was Tuesday." —Bats 2015

She could feel something unnatural following her every movement as she washed her bountiful Huzza and Wahzoozie" — BATS

...an ambitious array of dishonorable intentions that he intended to wield upon the Countess’s nether regions. — BATS 2015

They’re dogs. Never trust a man. Even when he’s dead. Especially when he’s dead. — Bats 2015

You’re going to show up to a duel, in the street, wearing Come F—k Me Heels?" — Bats 2015

Better to illuminate than merely to shine to deliver to others contemplated truths than merely to contemplate.

Time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time.

If you want to be on Forbes Rich List, use Cosmic Ordering.

How do you go on, when in your heart you begin to understand... there is no going back? There are some things that time cannot mend. Some hurts that go too deep.

If all men were just there would be no need of valor.

In my younger days, I was trying to write sophisticated prose and fantastic stories.

All stories are lies, but good stories are lies made of light and fire. They lift our hearts out of the dust and out of the grave.

Basketball is a simple game. Your goal is penetration, get the ball close to the basket, and there are three ways to do that. Pass, dribble and offensive rebound.

For every "Drive Safely" sign, shouldn't there be a "Resume Normal Driving" sign?

Eliminate the Diaspora, or the Diaspora will surely eliminate you.