Demetri Martin Quotes

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Demetri Martin Quote of the day

REGARDING THE MARCHING BAND: How much more interesting it would be to see a creeping band.

Demetri Martin, This is a Book

Demetri Martin Quotes: "It is illegal to yell “fire” in a crowded theater. If there is a fire, please yell something else instead, like “Flames!” or “Smoke maker!” or “Bad hot!"

It is illegal to yell “fire” in a crowded theater. If there is a fire, please yell something else instead, like “Flames!” or “Smoke maker!” or “Bad hot!

Demetri Martin, This is a Book

I like video games, but they're really violent. I'd like to play a video game where you help the people who were shot in all the other games. It'd be called 'Really Busy Hospital.

Demetri Martin