George Bernard Shaw Quotes

If you would stick to the concrete, and put your discoveries in the form of entertaining anecdotes about your adventures with women, your conversation would be easier to follow.

I try to follow his example, not to imitate him.

Poverty does not produce unhappiness: It produces degradation.

The function of comedy is to dispelunconsciousness by turning the searchlight of the keenest moral and intellectual analysisright on to it.

You can lose a man like that by your own death, but not by his.

If you cannot attain knowledge without torturing a dog, you must do without knowledge.

Every man is a revolutionist concerning the thing he understands. For example, every person who has mastered a profession is a skeptic concerning it, and consequently a revolutionist.

Sexually,Woman is Nature's contrivance for perpetuating its highest achievement.

Brigham Young lived to become immortal in history as an American Moses by leading his people through the wilderness into an unpromised land.

Revelations: A curious record of the visions of a drug addict.

Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again. If all economists were laid end to end they would not reach a conclusion.

The ideal love affair should be conducted by post.

Marry Ann; and at the end of a week you'll find no more inspiration in her than in a plate of muffins.

I prefer the man who calls his nonsense a mystery to him who who pretends it is a weighed, measured, analyzed fact.

The haughty American nation ... makes the Negro clean its boots and then proves the moral and physical inferiority of the Negro by the fact that he is a bootblack.

Compassion is the fellow-feeling of the unsound.

I don't. I look my age; and I am my age. It is the other people who look older than they are. What can you expect from people who eat corpses and drink spirits?

You have a choice of trusting the natural stability of gold, or the honesty and intelligence of members of government.

The criminal law is no use to decent people.

Anarchism is a game at which the police can beat you.

When a lion meets another with a louder roar, the first lion thinks the last a bore.

If you do not say a thing in an irritating way, you may as well not say it at all because people will not trouble themselves about anything that does not trouble them.

It is not the number of years we have behind us, but the number we have before us, that makes us careful and responsible and determined to find out the truth about everything.

When you read a biography remember that the truth is never fit for publication.

If a man is indolent, let him be poor. If he is drunken, let him be poor.... Also--somewhat inconsistently--blessed are the poor!

Fear is choosing the safe course

Martyrdom is the only path to immortality that requires no talent whatsoever.

Nothing is more dangerous than a poor doctor: not even a poor employer or a poor landlord.

For nearly twenty years I have been a published author... But I have never yet seen a book of mine offered for sale in a shop window.

I hate performers who debase great works of art; I long for their annihilation.

A tranquil woman can go on sewing longer than an angry man can go on fuming.

I am justified. For I chose wisdom and the knowledge of good and evil ; and now there is no evil; and wisdom and good are one. It is enough.

I am the most spontaneous speaker in the world because every word, every gesture, and every retort has been carefully rehearsed.

Sherlock Holmes was a drug addict without a single amiable trait.

An English army led by an Irish general: that might be a match for a French army led by an Italian general.

God has given us a world that nothing but our own folly keeps from being a paradise.

Every fool believes what his teachers tell him, and calls his credulity science or morality as confidently as his father called it divine revelation.

If all you are going to do in life are the things that are convenient and comfortable, the great things never get done.

I wish people would stop talking about my birthday.

All roads end at the grave, which is the gate to nothingness.

We are told that when Jehovah created the world he saw that it was good what would he say now

What a man is depends on his character; but what he does, and what we think of what he does, depends on his circumstances.

Of all the damnable waste of human life that ever was invented, clerking is the worst.

I was a cannibal for twenty-five years. For the rest I have been a vegetarian.

I like flowers, I also like children, but I do not chop their heads off and keep them in bowls of water around the house.

A contract for better for worse is a contract that should not be tolerated.

Life is a disease; and the only difference between on man and another is the stage of the disease at which he lives.

There is only one universal passion fear.

I don't believe in morality . I'm a disciple of Bernard Shaw.

Just as I cannot remember any time when I could not read and write, I cannot remember any time when I did not exercise my imagination in daydreams about women.