Carol Burnett Quotes

What I do when I write is I just write the way I would tell it, so it comes out just exactly the way I would talk to you.

I've always been able to recount things and I have a really good memory about dialog and what people have said before and this and that.

I always preferred working with somebody so I could look into their eyeballs and play tennis.

I always felt that I was more of an actress than a - I can't tell a joke to save my soul, but that I was a comedic actress.

Daddy, when he drank, just became sweeter. There wasn't a mean thought in his body. I've always said he was like a drunk Jimmy Stewart.

I love to write. I have always loved writing. That was my first love.

I can't tell a joke to save my soul. It's just not my thing, though I love to listen to jokes.

I'm really not that funny in real life! But I am the best audience one could find. I love to laugh.

Funny is funny. I dare anyone to look at Tim Conway and Harvey Korman doing the dentist sketch, which is more than 40 years old, and not scream with laughter.

I do the 'New York Times' crossword puzzle every morning to keep the old grey matter ticking.

Edgy is fine - I'm not a prude by any stretch of the imagination - but what's wrong with a good ol' belly laugh? I miss that.

Celebrity was a long time in coming it will go away. Everything goes away.

I loved the Kennedy Center Honors because you just sit there, smile, wave, and cry.

My mother was very funny. My dad had a great sense of humor. My grandmother, too.

Comedy is tragedy - plus time.

I have always grown from my problems and challenges from the things that don't work out. That's when I've really learned.

There's a quote of hers [Lucille Ball] that I've always loved: 'I guess I would rather regret the things I've done than to regret the things I've never done.