Alan Quotes

Nobody can honestly say that they never lie.

I don't believe in God and all that. But I am Jewish, and very proud to be so, very proud of the culture.

It will take a brave person to cull the benefits system and analyse who deserves and who doesn't.

The boring side of business is what makes it work.

During negotiations nothing is gained by attacking people's comfort zones.

If there was a market in mass-produced portable nuclear weapons, we'd market them, too.

There's a lot of regrets about last year - maybe turning up was the biggest regret about it

I don't like this young crudeness now which is supposed to be comedy on Friday nights.

If you lock me in the room with a piano teacher for a year I might be able to knock out a rendition of 'Roll Out The Barrel,' but will I ever be a concert pianist? No.

I like to be a very fair person.

There is a lot of luck in football. Following England is like following Wycombe Wanders or Leyton Orient. You hope for the best and hope you are lucky.

There was a desire to see me being nasty and horrible, and of course that's not really me

You can't stop people printing what they want to print.

I did not come into football to make money. I had already made millions.

I find it strange that Gisela Gschaider a 1974 immigrant from Germany is on the brexit panel telling us British what we should do .

I've never been a big fan of improvisation, because I think you appreciate the process and the cleverness of it more than the actual comedy in most cases.

I've always felt that improv looks and feels more clever when you're there to experience it live than when you have the degree of separation that television creates. Television raises expectations.

My two boys were the same ages as the kids in the show. In real life or in between the breaks I was raising two kids off camera who were not unlike the two kids who were being paid to be my kids.

I'm not able to go in with an act that I use month to month year to year all the time. It's constantly evolving and changing and that keeps me on my toes but certainly adds to the challenge.

I wouldn't call myself a standup in the presence of Jerry Seinfeld or Chris Rock, but I do my share of it and it has been and remains part of my activity and I like it.

If it is a first offense, you ground them and have a talk. The second offense would call for counseling.

Always take much less than you think you'll need.

I think I was always realistic - well, not the Percy thing, that was ridiculous - but I never dreamed of being a racing car driver or anything.

You hope people won't be tricky or miserable. If you're in public life, it's important not to be. If someone says, 'I like your programme, thank you,' you should be grateful. I am. Why be nasty?

It's never much fun at school - it's just dates. Then as you get older, for some reason, you get more interested.

I love Paris for its wide boulevards and cafes, and Rome for the ancient history, as seen at the Forum.

Alan Bennett and Judi Dench are amazingly talented people who don't let you down when you meet them.

Effective science teaching calls for active contact with research and that teachers need to mingle with other scientists and to know what is going on in the field.

I'm a big boy. I've been through enough that I understand how things are.

I like comedies, and my brain sort of spins in that direction. So I'm really happy to say there were several smartass comments that come from me [on Star Wars].

[Heihei] a really dumb rooster. You have to just turn the rooster so his head ends up hitting the grain. He's not smart enough to eat.

R2-D2 is like that, but I think because he doesn't speak actual words, his jokes don't land. It's really a hindrance. And the same with BB-8. But Artoo is a lot stronger.

This movie [Moana] has a very small cast, and this was the role [Heihei] that they offered me. I loved voicing him.

[Clowns] gotten a really bad rap in the last few years. People have really given into their own fears and have celebrated their fears in that way. American Horror Story didn't help.

I feel much more comfortable as an artist collaborating with others because I feel more mature.

[I'm] a huge defender of clowns around the world.

I love Diego [ Luna Cassian]. Diego is very funny. He's a very cool guy. I'm looking forward to doing all the press stuff and getting to hang out with him and everybody again.

I haven't been to too many cons since Star Wars, and I don't think it's really going to change until it comes out.

I've signed a few Kaytoo photos and things and a couple of action figures [on ComicCon], but really it's not that many.

Because I'm CGI, [John Swartz] gave me a role of an Imperial pilot in one scene, so I had a day where I was on camera dressed as a black suit and a little cap that they wear.

I feel like it'll change after the movie [Star Wars] comes out, if it does. It's really the other way around, surprisingly, as far as Con Man goes.

I definitely knew how to fly. That's something you don't forget. One spaceship is pretty much like another when it comes to flying.

[Heihei] is stupidest chicken on planet Earth and mascot.

It's amazing how much actual chicken sounds lend themselves to stupidity.

It's closer to just acting in a film because it was a six-month commitment. We got to fly all over the world.

Gareth [Edwards] was very open to just shaping the performances and the scenes to fit what was happening with the actors and the storytelling that was emerging.

[ Gareth Edwards] never wanted to force anything that wasn't true. He's very much an actor's director, and it was loose.

BB-8 [from Star Wars] his accent is so thick. You can't make out a damn word he says.

I actually oddly have done another robot motion capture. I did Sonny in I, Robot.

I don't wear jewelry, as a man.