Uncanny situations

Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz?

It is the heart that makes a man rich. He is rich according to what he is not according to what he has.

I used to believe my art had to be about the things that brought me joy and gave me hope. But I learned that art can be found in all of life, even in pain.

My uncle was the town drunk - and we lived in Chicago.

The Jews caused the war, the Jews caused the outbreak of thieving and robbery all over the country, the Jews caused the inefficiency of the navy

Laughter is a powerful way to tap positive emotions

Stand-up comedy is an art form and it dies unless you expand it.

There will be water if God wills it.

Velcro: what a rip-off.

Perseverance... keeps honor bright: to have done, is to hang quite out of fashion, like a rusty nail in monumental mockery.